VALATX

* yeeeaaahhhh mothafuckin boatmobile almost broke down =k *

146 dayMoons Ranujuya 23^dr,

The morning!

Then we went out to.. somewhere. Maybe something with internet or whatever? Probably also to get shit like food or whatever nonsense. We stopped at a gas station for Henry to fill up his tires with air and then disaster struck. Well, it wasn't really that bad, but his valve stem broke. Asploded. Luckily the nice people around there said there was a tire place right down the road, and someone Henry actually knew came with a truck to replace the valve stem. So that was nice.

Couldn't have gone better, really.

Eventually we got home and started preparing the shit we were gonna cook: rabbit and alligator from Jacksonville, Florida! Wooooo

So this happened.

Then Henry chopped it up into little bits.

Charlotte sobbing over onions for the rabbit cacciatore.

I really liked the whole scene, cooking and drinking with two wonderful people in a wonderful place.

That's the rabbit stew before I burned it by leaving it on high for like 20 minutes!

I guess there was some of this.

Oh, so there was some of that too.

day 147 | ht42^{yraunaj yadseut}

Mothafuckin oil change time

We had a blinker that was out for a while and we finally got it fixed today by replacing the stop light which had apparently gone out right when we replaced the bulb for the blinker. So anyway that's all good now.

Woohoo

Idk what else we did that day cause there are no pictures so I guess it was just that insane of a day/night...

==148 \ 2t^5h janal

The final countdown.

Mothafuckin King's Popcorn woo! Also I got pork rinds which I apparently fucking love!

Yeah, some kinda beard face.

Then Henry taught Charlotte how to deal with being raped! We learned her stock response to being propositioned is throat punching. 

Later, they both helped trim my hair and also beard! That was at like 2 am or something, despite our plan to get up at like 6 or whatever to leave ASAP.

Finally, after like three months, there's some kind of method to this monstrosity.

-100+249=62-36=jaineruths

Henry helped pack the trunk! This is probably like the fifth variation on packing we've had.

Charlotte was not happy about leaving. We finally left at 9:30, whole day of driving ahead.

Some kinda fuckin quarry on the drive!

Some kinda fuckin clouds on the drive!

Some kinda fuckin mountain range on the drive!

Some kinda fuckin pepperoni and cheese sandwiches on the drive!

That was in Georgia, I think, and also when we started hearing this atrocious rattling from somewhere in/near the engine. Holy shit, so many miles to go, bad time for the car to sound like it's about to fall apart. So we kept driving!

hello

They sell liquor at walmarts in Louisiana!?

fries. [27/150]! = 0.92377

Google it.

ALSO, 150TH DAY ALREADY HOLY TITSLACKINGOREOS LEGGO MY FLEBSTONE!

Driving in to fuckin N'Ohleans!

City!

They got mothafuckin leaves on they mothafuckin trees!

Mango.. just like in Orlando, what the shit guys.

Some doof walking in front of us. Oh yeah, there's also a steamboat on the Mississippi.

BEIGNETS FROM CAFE DU MONDE

SHIT JABIR FOUND US AGAIN

Inside Saint Louis Cathedral

Outside Saint Louis Cathedral

It'd be nice to have walls to put up this art, but...

Oh my god seafood yesss. Catfish, jambalaya, buttered toast and a fuckin huge shrimp poboy!

That place was so good. Jabir had a gumbo.

Charlotte's new favorite road (step aside, route 1 in CA!)

bluebayou.com some really sweet looking waterpark in LA

mmhmmmm

Then we met up with Valerie! Wooo! She took us to this pizza place called Mellow Mushroom

It's a big.. fish.. garbage.. sculpture.. centerfold!

This place was really cool, reminded me that we are now in a big city where cool people are more common.

Sweet thai chili and stuff pizza and a mushroom pizza

It looks like there was a tornado of children in their bathroom.

Yes.

I liked the signs... yeah I know, I have like 85 pictures of this one place.

This is the room we're staying in, graciously provided by Valerie's friend Madelaine!

...I haven't flossed in a little while.

151^st shatturd inv.28

We brought our car to this mechanic a mile away (cause things are that close in a city) and Madelaine took us out to breakfast at this fucking amazingly delicious place called Another Broken Egg or whatever.

Omfg. Blackberry and brie waffle. Lobster and cream cheese stuffed omelette. And I don't remember what omelette Madelaine had.

We got the bad news from the mechanic while we were eating – it would cost $OMANYDOLLARS to fix the boatmobile. I was hoping it wouldn't be anything transmission related, but it was. It was exactly what I was afraid it would be, the flexplate (flywheel equivalent of automatic transmission). Madelaine's dad thought it might be the CV joint. Well, it was both. Also some seals would need replacing and blah blah blah. So I kinda freaked out for a little while.

We finished breakfast and went back to the mechanic to get our car. We took it to a different place (Firestone) and later they called and actually told me I needed a new engine. What the fuck? Yeah, no I don't you asshats. Turns out they don't work on engines or transmissions, so if the sound is coming from either of those, they tell you it's broken and needs to be replaced. Well fuck that, I'm not about to pay $8,000 for you idiots to do whatever you want.

Anyway, back at Madelaine's...

THEY GOTS RED TOWELS

Madelaine's little aquarium, like a tiny barrier reef.

...they surprised us with dinner at a Polish restaurant!

I couldn't believe it. We knew there was some surprise place but not what it was called (which would have given it away) nor what type of food. Valerie said she thought it would be a good mix of nostalgia and torture. That was pretty accurate.

The food was good though! Also, the waiter thought we were artists. Also I spoke to him in Polish.

duynas 29 eeehhhmmmm ¿251- 

We went out for some internet at this cafe named Blue Giraffe, complete with a droopy-eyed, beanie-wearing, soft-spoken guy playing alternative music on the speakers. Needless to say, it was a pretty cool place.

I mean look at these fuckin mugs! Should've asked if we could take the octopus one.

So Valerie actually offered to pay for the whole thing and also offered to trade cars (she has a new Toyota RAV4) which was an insane(ly generous) proposition. We ultimately settled on smaller financial assistance that we are so grateful for. Luckily, the mechanic does deferred payments (6 months no interest) through Synchrony, which was actually how I paid for my stupid wisdom teeth (yay Care Credit!), so we won't end up paying all of it at once or anything like that.

Yes, that is to say that we decided to take the car to the first place we went to. We're pretty limited on time and don't know who to trust around here as far as mechanics go. I'm sure that factored into their decision when they quoted us the price, but.. what are we gonna do? Getting even just the necessary shit done (flexplate replacement and CV joint replacement) will be a lot. Well, we basically replanned the rest of our trip, cutting it a bit shorter. We now plan to end up in Nevada some time in April. Magically, picking random numbers for the amount of days we'd spend at each place, we ended up with 61 days. Of course, that doesn't actually include travel time...

Replan, reroute, rebudget. Story of our lives.

That means I gotta start my fuckin cover letter and get a resume together and shit, cause in three months I'll be working at the Gigafactory. Holy balls. Now I'm anxious about that. I guess I knew we had only a few months left since we just have our western national park tour left, but damn. I didn't think we'd be this close to the end of the travelings. I did end up writing a cover letter actually, on Monday, but I'll just post it at the end so you guys can all see it. I wrote it almost stream-of-consciousness, but I think it'll secure me a position for sure.

The Blue Giraffe had a crab, crawfish, and corn bisque!

Back at Valerie's, a tub of pork rinds and a long brick of cream cheese!

Then we went to the park!

It was a pretty park.

I made fried rice! It was a hit!

Lady and Bella didn't have any.

So here's my cover letter. Let me know what you think!

Sir and Madam

I fuckin drove across the country for you. Now you're gonna treat me like a squashed turd you had the misfortune of bringing into your house and have your dog vomit back onto your shoe? I won't stand for it. My name is Tophat Jones and I just won't abide by your laws of trickery. I was a veteran, now I just float in my boat. You think I don't deserve all of the praise and computers you can muster? Look, let me make this simple. I have a face and feet as well, at least. You have some like battery shit or whatever. Let me grab your computers and things so that everything will be good for the night and then you know what else is gonna happen right you're gonna give me two vouchers for one couch. That's my benefit if you know what I mean.

I worked once, now I don't. Cause fuck it, ya know? So now comes the time that you tell me I'm hired. Great. I will start at 50,000 a month and then some. Let me skateboard in the factory cause then I will be the most supreme efficiency man and you will never have to look at your shoes again. Just one slip of my tongue and you'll be sliding into a whole new world, a new point of view. Think you're dreaming? Think again. I have the potatoes to be what it takes in a world of robots and battery production. Never think twice again. That's my slogan, and I just don't know what else you think is going to be happening but never think about it again. Never again. Always remember.

Whatever,

Karol